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Friday, December 30, 2005
Top Nine Most Entertaining Albums of 2005
This is basically the list of albums I bought this year. In alphabetical order, natch:
Celebrity NFL Picks - Week 17
It's the last week of the regular season and the first week that Derik and I have submitted the exact same picks for the five games.
Thursday, December 29, 2005
Top Nine Most Entertaining Movies of 2005
Why 'most entertaining' and not simply 'best'? Because what other reason would you go to the movies except to be entertained? Why nine and not ten? Because I didn't see enough movies. This list is culled from those movies which I saw (in the actual theater) during the calendar year of 2005, so "Million Dollar Baby" makes my list even though it was a late-2004 release. And pictures like "Munich" or "Match Point" probably will make my 2006 list because I simply have no time to see them before Saturday. Here they are, in chronological order:
Car crashes into McDonald's
Deborah Smith of Newton, NJ swerved across a median on route 206 to avoid another vehicle and slammed her Mazda into the local McDonald's. The impact broke a window, but overall the damage was minor and only cosmetic, police said."Insert witty drive-thru remark here" Wednesday, December 28, 2005
Celebrity NFL Picks - Week 16 recap
I'm getting really tired of losing to Derik.
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
ORIGINAL DEATHPOOL UPDATE OMFG
 This doesn't affect the current deathpool, but for those of you who remember the original pool from 7 years ago, one of the dark horse candidates has passed. Michael Vale, the Dunkin Donuts guy, has died from complications from diabetes. Keith had him. Time to make the donuts, indeed.The turducken is for losers
The turducken, a tasty treat made by stuffing a chicken into a duck into a turkey, is yesterday's news. Real people enjoy the ten-bird roast, or the gooduckardguickenpheatridgegeoncock. Monday, December 26, 2005
Double Feature Finder
One of my favorite pastimes is catching two movies for the price of one at the local cinema. Nothing beats catching an early showing of "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" and then sneaking across the hall for a late showing of "Wedding Crashers" on a rainy summer night. Illegal? Yes. Unethical? Certainly. Fun? Hell yes! After years and years of getting ripped off by theater owners and Hollywood studios alike, you have the chance to get back a little piece of the action. Check out Double Feature Finder and plan your illicit trip to the theater. Warning: may not work in certain Loews theaters that are separated into two wings when each wing is manned by a separate Ticket Nazi. If one movie is in the north wing and one movie is in the south wing, you cannot sneak from theater to theater without getting caught. Double warning: if you see a double feature of "Cheaper by the Dozen 2" and "Fun with Dick & Jane" then Hollywood still wins and you still lose. Triple warning: the super value combo is, in fact, neither super nor a value. Discuss. Saturday, December 24, 2005
Friday, December 23, 2005
Celebrity NFL Picks - Week 16
I stink:
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
Celebrity NFL Picks - Week 15 recap
TIE! I am emboldened by my correct Giants pick and embiggened by my upset of the year Chargers pick, but I still trail Derik by 6 games on the year.
Saturday, December 17, 2005
Friday, December 16, 2005
Celebrity NFL Picks - Week 15
 After six weekends of picking football games, I'm a full six games behind Derik and I only have three weeks of regular season play left to catch up. Let me put my prognosticating cap on! Another week, another five games to pick:
Guttenberg, avast!
 From an interview in the U.K.'s Metro newspaper, we get Steve Guttenberg at his best. Witness:Guttenberg: Everyone keeps asking me that stupid question: "What are you doing?" I say: "Why do I need to do anything? I'm rich." Do you want me to be poor again? Do you want me to go back to making tomato soup out of ketchup and water? Or would you like me to be a multimillionaire and be rewarded for all the entertainment I gave you for all those years? I'm enjoying life now. If I was a plumber and I'd done the most plumbing jobs between 1980 and 1990, everyone would be saying: "What a great plumber" - he says "f**k you to the world and he's enjoying himself." But for some reason, as an actor, you're not allowed to say: "I'm f**king rich, bro."Just shut up and make another Police Academy movie. Guttenberg: I think I would (do it). You never know.Huzzah! Tuesday, December 13, 2005
Ruminant mammal in distress
 I've said it before and I'll say it again: Deer love them some smoothies.Celebrity NFL Picks - Week 14 recap
Quickie recap...Derik is kicking my ass, still:
Monday, December 12, 2005
Deathpool Update
Deathpool standings have been updated to reflect Richard Pryor's untimely passing. Tom (aka Angel of Death) has knocked off half his list already. Rob C. gets on the board leaving my dad (aka Angel of Mercy) in last place with 0 deaths. Hey Dad, put me on your list next year! Sunday, December 11, 2005
Car crashes into Staunton bookstore
Our Virginia correspondent Vince A. brings us this car-crashin story wherein a 70 year old woman swerves to avoid an SUV and ends up deep inside a bookstore. Good stuff! Thanks Vince! Saturday, December 10, 2005
Friday, December 09, 2005
Celebrity NFL Picks - Week 14
Quickie picks:
Wednesday, December 07, 2005
Celebrity NFL Picks - Week 13 Recap
Quick and late recap today: Derik beat my sorry ass again. Boo-hoo.
Come on down
 Hey y'all, our good friend Jill and her husband visited the Price is Right studios for some hot gaming action recently. Jill did a fantastic job coaching her husband as he actually made it on stage and WON A CAR! I believe he played either Any Number or Lucky $even and won either a Ford Focus or a Mercury Mystique. Thanks, BDG, for tivoing and screen-cappin'.Friday, December 02, 2005
Bloodthirsty squirrels, ho!
 A severe pine cone shortage in Lazo, Russia has led to local squirrels seeking a different food source, in this case, tasty doggies.Komosmolskaya Pravda notes that in a previous incident this autumn chipmunks terrorised cats in a part of the territory.The rodents must be stopped! Celebrity NFL Picks - Week 13
Despite his legal problems, our Michael Irvin impersonater Derik will indeed be participating in this week's Celebrity Pick'em, where Derik (as Mike the Pipemaker Irvin) and Rob (as Steve Hall-of-Famre Young) pick the five best games of the week. This past Thanksgiving weekend, Derik and Rob tied. Here's this week:
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