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Current Terror Level:
Tuesday, August 31, 2004
My favorite sports

An exhaustive ordered list of my favorite sports I have watched in the past 365 days:
  1. Major League Baseball
  2. National Football League
  3. College basketball
  4. International soccer
  5. College football
  6. College soccer
  7. National Basketball Association
  8. High school soccer
  9. Major golf tournaments
  10. Spelling bee
  11. Little League World Series
  12. Grand slam tennis tournaments
  13. Olympic softball
  14. Olympic volleyball
  15. High school track
  16. Olympic swimming
  17. Professional boxing
  18. High school basketball
  19. High school field hockey
  20. National Hockey League
Note: if anyone I'm related to is playing either #6 or #8, they immediately move to the top of the list.


Thursday, August 26, 2004

Might dementia be starting to set in for Iracane.com favorite Bea Arthur ?


Deathpool

A couple addenda to the original rules for the First Actual Iracane.com Deathpool:
  • Any contestant can choose any celebrity, so if everyone wants Tara Reid, then everyone can have Tara Reid (just like real life!)
  • Everyone's entry will be posted after September 15th, so don't worry about anyone stealing your really clever choice
Let's see some goddamned entries already!


Wednesday, August 25, 2004
Rodney Dangerfield to have heart surgery

The question at hand: will Rodney last until the aforementioned September 15th deadline? Speaking of which, we have so far ZERO entries. (well, we have one entry, but I really don't count)


Wednesday, August 18, 2004
The Next Big Thing

Are you interested in participating in the First Actual* Iracane.com Deathpool? All you have to do is email me a list of 10 celebrities you believe will kick the bucket within the next couple years. Here are the rules:
  • Entries must be submitted by September 15, 2004 at 11:59 PM
  • Participants must submit a list of 10 celebrities, in order from #1 to #10, plus one alternate celebrity
  • As of 12:01 AM on September 15, 2006, whomever has the most dead celebrities will win the grand prize
  • In case of a tie, points will be awarded in the following manner: 10 points if your #1 celebrity dies, 9 points for #2, etc.
  • Points will only be used in case of a tie
  • In the event that one of your submitted celebrities dies before the contest starts on September 15th, your alternate celebrity will be used as your #10 celebrity
  • I reserve the right to disqualify any person listed on your entry for not being famous enough (i.e. the neighborhood coke whore)
  • Once again, assassinating your celebrity is not allowed and extremely frowned upon
Good luck, you morbid sons-of-bitches!
*I would say "Annual" but since the first deathpool lasted 7 years, that wouldn't really be good usage.


Friday, August 13, 2004
Julia Child Dies

Julia Child dies in her sleep. I win!


Wednesday, August 04, 2004
Throw another dog on the grill for me

Can you spot the ironic incongruence on this screengrab of an article I read earlier today?


Tuesday, August 03, 2004
I'm fat

My realization of the day: the Chocolate Iced Custard Filled donut at Krispy Kreme is as good as (if not better than) the Boston Creme donut at Dunkin Donuts. Theoretically, I have no reason to ever go back to DD now. In reality, however, the proximity of DD (100 yards from my apartment) compared to the faraway reaches of KK (75 minute drive) forces me to go to DD to satiate my need for cream-filled cake-like desserts.


Monday, August 02, 2004
Family keeps petrified orange for 83 years

NEWS FLASH: Nothing worth reporting happens in McAlester, Oklahoma.


Car crash!

Seventeen-year-old Vietnamese-American girl crashes her car because she was distracted by "eating corn on the cob". Is that what the kids are calling it nowadays?